Saturday, 16 February 2013

Democrat Christopher Dorner Will Vote For Obama In 2016.

The left liberal mainstream media react to 'Smokin' Christopher Dorner's trail of progressive left and thus excellent murder, mayhem and lies.

Exciting CNN approved killer Democrat and liberal media fan Christopher Dorner, who tragically committed suicide one month too late, says he will vote in the 2016 elections and cast his ballot for Obama.  

“And it’s not just cos’ I’m dead” he stated cheerfully, insisting that it’s also because "I am a walking exigent circumstance with no OFF or reset button.” Chris, an enormous fan of Michelle Obama with whom he shares a striking resemblance, took a tender moment to note Michelle’s very important hair: “I love your bangs” he said ironically, backing up his insights on the experimental Charlie Sheen saying that " are effing awesome and that JoeBiden, the maker of BidenDependsTM, was one of the few genuine and charismatic politicians.

Chris the heroic homicidal maniac, who selflessly committed four principled murders for outstandingly violent leftist reasons, and thus entirely necessary, was also influenced by another prominent Obama voter in General Colin 'Rino' Powell. “…your book and journey motivated me. You are an inspiration to all Americans and influenced me greatly.” Readers are encouraged to turn to ‘Chapter 13: How I Murdered Four People, Committed Suicide and Was Subsequently Burnt to Charred Remains and Became a Leftard Hero.’

Christopher took time out from his busy schedule to remember one of the world’s most outstanding and powerful narcissistic couples, [after the Obama’s]: “Hillary Clinton. You’ll make one hell of a president in 2016. Much like your husband, Bill, you will be one of the greatest.” Chris, always the heart warming master of babbling perversity, admired first President George H. Bush, who wisely encouraged the Iraqi people to rise up against Saddam while he courageously watched them being murdered wholesale.

Chris loved and admired his mainstream and taxpayer funded left liberal media hero's, almost as much as his insightful mass-murder spree and posting his charmingly scatter-gun, prolix and incoherent logical fallacy laden manifesto of brilliant and necessary madness.
 “Chris Matthews, Joe Scarborough, Pat Harvey, Brian Williams, Soledad Obrien, Wolf Blitzer, Meredith Viera, Tavis Smiley, and Anderson Cooper, keep up the great work and follow Cronkite’s lead. I hold many of you in the same regard as Tom Brokaw and the late Peter Jennings.” Sadly, Chris neglected to mention how he hangs his kitchen towels, his for or against views on elephants and his opinion on DryWall. So we’ll never know.

Nevertheless, Dorner still remembered to send well wishes of Hope N’ ChangeTM to a member of the Latino community. “Too bad Trayvon didn’t smash your skull completely open, Zim” hoped Chris. Readers too were reminded of the wonderful criminal acts many blacks now commit thanks largely to over forty years of caring progressive policy that has destroyed the black family and neighbourhoods. At only 13% of the U.S population, black males still work hard delivering 50% of all violent crime, not only murdering Asians and whites and sexually assaulting around 37,000 white females in 2007 for example, but also in other D.O.J statistics of 94% of black males who are murdered are murdered by other black males. Another progressive success story. Go liberal's! But the Tea Party and Fox cable subscriptions are racist.

In Chris’s inspiring, irrational and unread ramblings of CNN lauded insight, he made many thrilling, contradictory points and not all were on his head. Chris liked Jerry Seinfeld too, when ironically Jerry likes golf and cereal but not serial murder rampages. Did Christopher Dorner like golf or cereal? Again, we’ll probably never know. And finally, was Dorner like many, simply driven mad by the brilliance and perfection of Hope N’ Change until forced to murder the unarmed to make people to see the beauty of the progressive dream, and to bring America together going FORWARD?  

Saturday, 9 February 2013

Obama Administration Bailout Of Aluminium Catering Wrap Maker As “Too Big to Foil”.

Pictured are BidenWrap CEO Ben Ghazi and President Obama as they organize confidential files. 

The Obama Administration's five hundred billion dollars in financial aid to tinfoil leaders ‘BidenWrapTM’ [with the iconic trademark of 'Joe the fool's' grinning face on each box and the slogan “pack your Sloppy Joe’s with Joe!”], has ended in bankruptcy and failure, ironically by lunch on the same day as the massive tax-payer funded bailout was signed by President Obama.

The heavily unionized sandwich wrap giant which saw losses of over $1200 on each two yard box of tinfoil sold, was unable to respond to consumer demands, instead focusing on ‘Green’ alternatives made of tree bark, lawn clippings and manure. There were virtually uniform complaints that such products simply “didn’t work” and were ill suited to wrapping food due to what one customer sighted as “the smell of shit”.  

In answer to a single question regarding the failure, Whitehouse Press Secretary Carmichael Ali stated that he will “not respond to racist Republican hatred of lawn clippings and manure”. Ali added that “the GOP just hates anything green or brown and even plaid as well as many pastel colors. Their racism knows no limits! I’ve seen GOP Senators attack dark colored curtains and deliberately step on black floor tiles. Republicans even hate off-whites such as Nancy Pelosi. They even hate John Brennan just because he loves and either converted to Islam or might as well have.”

When quizzed that the pun of "too big to foil" should actually read as "too big not to foil", Obama officials said that unlike "progressive Democrats," [Republicans] are "living in a grammatical past, a past that wants to oppress minorities and their word-play with so-called correct spelling. Spelling is an inherently racist construct" and that "there are no zebras in Nebraska". The official concerned declined to elaborate what such statements actually mean, beyond stating that he "liked pies especially with fruit filling but not on Thursdays".

Saturday, 2 February 2013

24 Hours From Thompson.

 Prime Minister Julian Willard denying any connection between her sudden calling of an election only 24 hours before Labor M.P Craig Thompson's arrest for alleged mediocrity and other union funded doin' the mambo.

Dearest P.M I had to write to say that Craig might not be home anymore
Cos somethin' happened to him while he was driving home 
And he’s not that sane anymore

Oh you are only 24 hours from Thompson
He’s only one day away from arrest
Maybe saw a reddening light and stopped to rest for the night
And is that when he paid her
As he pulled in inside of a small brothel
She was there and so he walked up to her
Asked where he could get something to eat and she showed him where

Oh you are only 24 hours from Thompson
He’s only one day away from the law
Maybe get tied to the bed and then ask her for some T and A
She says okay

Oh you are only 24 hours from Thompson
He’s only one day away from arrest
The election announce it today
A new disaster everyday as you were dancing closely
All of a sudden you lost control as he helped your charms
And you lawyered him, kissed him 
Told him you’d die before you let him out of your arms

Oh she was only 24 hours from Thompson
He’s only one day away from arrest
I hate to do this to you
But they know somebody knew
What can I do 
Or you may never never never never be P.M again