Thursday, 6 November 2008
Obama supporters only 50 percent less racist than KKK.
You wouldn't read about it.
[Dear sports, I dedicate todays feeble effort to the greatest and most swingin', hip, black Republican, Conservative Christian, martial artist, musician, comedian and thinker, on Utoob. No, really. Alfonso Rachel AKA machosauceproductions. Click on the links. They're nearly all machosauced!]
A report released today to coincide with the election of Barack Obama as precedent, shows that Obama supporters are only half as tolerant or even Liberal as they believe.
“By default, all Democrat voters voted for a white man as much as they did for a black man” said Milo Filofax, the Director of a study titled ‘Obama: The Auditing of Soap’. The reports findings may cause some concern among white Obama voters, not only among those that hate other white people, but especially those that hate themselves.
Even with regular Starbucks breaks, being patronising to minorities is demanding both physically and time-wise, sometimes taking up whole afternoons of chanting meaningless slogans that cost nothing. This doesn’t include the long journey from bohemian areas to welfare and crime plagued urban sprawl, and then back again to better neighbourhoods.
Naturally, to discover that all the years of posturing have been a delusion or even worse, an utter fraud, could prove emotionally devastating”, said Milo.
"After such an epiphany, ones sense of moral vanity and Cognitive Dissonance could be so shattered, so thoroughly discredited by useless facts, that one may never recover, incapable of wearing a Che the child killer t-shirt in an affluent and free democracy again", added Filofax.
“What’s more, it would be crushing for anyone honestly curious, to learn that after the Civil War, which was declared and fought by Abraham Lincoln the Republican, it was actually the Democratic Party who founded the KKK to stop the efforts of the Republican abolitionists.
And that this connects seamlessly with the Democrats trying to stop Republican Harry Truman desegregating the armed forces. And that major long-term Democrat Senator and KKK man Robert Byrd, tried to stop the Civil Rights Act in the 1950’s and 1960’s. And that Martin Luther King was a Republican, for instance”, said Filofax.
“For Democrats, the fear is that the report could trigger across many poorer black areas, a sudden outbreak of business based and professional affluence, and even violent riots for higher education, forever destroying the Democratic Party’s dream of increasing welfare”, stated Milo.
According to "Auditing for Soap', another possible area of concern for Obama voters such as the Sean Penn Berkley Backslapping Society, and the Bel Air Residents For Fidel, is that after forty years of social programs based entirely on Left ideology that have ended in the predicted cultural and community wide disasters of today, to then vote for the same party that has promoted them, could appear even ironic.
Ironically "this may be one positive area for Liberals", says Milo, as Liberals do often “love irony”.
The report noted that the MSM consistently reports over eighteen times the amount of negative stories about Sarah Palin as opposed to Obama. “Mathematically”, says Milo, “that kind of deliberate bias and manipulation could mean that in reality, Obama is actually 300 times worse than Palin!”
The report shows this is due to the unfortunately highly professional Governor Palin empirically being a successful, hardworking, honest state head and a respected family woman, whose entire career and background is on record, and her friends and associates being similar to her true history.
This contrasts a little with Obama and his life of wonderful Marxist activism, infiltration, his eager participation in tax payer funded Leftist indoctrination programs, as well as his long associations with terrorists and fraudsters both foreign and domestic . Milo Filofax has graphs that show Obama’s "appropriate" negativity more realistically in the high ten to the power of nine range. “The One’s’ story has enough delightfully beyond belief history for ten people, five of them white”, said Milo.
“And the figures just all add up, especially when we calculate in that nearly everything Obama has ever said is a lie, especially when he says “My name is Barack Obama”.
Featuring an ironic photo of Charlton Heston and Sidney Poitier on the cover, two of a handful of Hollywood actors marching with Martin Luther King circa 1960 in the Civil Rights movement, the report calculated that it has a 10,000 to 1 chance of being reported.